Rosie at 7 wks old!
Rosie was a sweet and happy little girl here at 7 weeks old. I wanted everyone to see her as she was when her Life first started in her Rose Garden. She still is sweet and a beautiful little girl. Now Rosie is 12 years old just in Feb 2010. She started limping last year in July after jumping out of the car. We thought she sprained her leg. Little did we know we were about to begin a long journey fighting “C” (cancer) a bad word around our house as I had breast cancer myself 5 years ago. She was there for me threw all the bad days of my treatments and she helped me get through it all. Now I need to be there for her. Rosie is named after my favorite flower the Rose! She is like a Rose in the Rose Garden, beautiful and delicate. That is her personality too. She is kind, loving, loyal and always there for me. She has qualities I wish some humans could have. I look at her and she makes me feel like smiling she has been like a best friend, always there for me to be with. I love her so much!
Rosie’s Rose Garden is struggling to stay in bloom since August of last year. We found out Rosie had this Osteosarcoma in her left front leg near the shoulder. When my vet called me on the phone to tell me she had “C” I could hardly believe the words, it was like 5 years ago all over again when I found out I had cancer on the phone. All the helpless feelings come back.
This is Rosie now 12 years latter. She still has that sweet face! We finally found our way to the University Of Florida Small Animal Clinic at the College in Gainesville, FL where they have the best Doctors and technology around here. Within 2 weeks of finding out what she had we were speaking to the surgeon/oncologist there. They were talking about amputation and I couldn’t even imagine taking her leg off. I couldn’t understand why they couldn’t fix her leg. We went to UF because we heard about a new procedure that was limb sparing called “Stereotactic Radiation Surgery” (SRS). We wanted to find out more about it and if Rosie qualified(it is not for the faint of wallet, by the way). Well long story short, after several xrays and tests, she did qualify. SRS is a one time dose of strong radiation that is done from all angles circumfrencing the tumor so the outside skin only gets hit one time but the tumor gets hit by the Radiation many times in the center of the target. It actually kills the tumor and the bone becomes dead in that one spot too. That’s the risk, the bone can become brittle there and fracture. There is a 70% chance of no problem and then she walks fine afterwards. They have had some good success with it. However it was an expensive gamble. I took the gamble and hoped for the best. Amputation is still the first choice of treatment by Doctors. But both treatments accomplish the same thing. The cancer is gone until one day it returns.
Rosie had other complications, when they did all the tests to qualify for SRS they found a massive liver tumor in her belly. It was also cancer but a different kind not related to her Oesteosarcoma. So they said it was contained and that they could take it out. So within 2 weeks she had 2 very complicated procedures. She got thru both of them and came home walking very well. For 2 weeks we watched her walk like herself. Then suddenly she started limping again! After xrays and to our dismay her leg had fractured! We had already started chemo. She was to have Carboplatin. So we all agreed to continue with the Chemo and continue to see if she was weight bearing, which she was. So now 5 chemo treatments latter which ended in Jan 5th, 2010 she is still limping, and worse than before.
She’s on so many pain killers it’s not funny. She has a hairline fracture that must be causing her enough pain that she lifts the paw up a lot of the time. She doesn’t use it to get up. She does use it to walk. But she treads lightly on it. She can actually run better than she walks as she thrusts herself forward, it’s more like a skip and a hop. I think her pain has become much worse and it’s so hard to watch her struggle with every step she takes. So our Rose Garden is not so rosy right now. But Rosie is so determined to be her sweet self. The Drs are recommending !! Amputation!! And we are finally trying to come to terms with this decision that we avoieded for so long.
After plenty of tears and research and wakeless nights like tonight, and talking to all of you nice folks on Tripawds, we found the courage to call and make the appointment to take her in Monday March 15th with possible surgery on the 16th. We have 2 days left. It took 2 weeks to get this appointment. All I can think about is what I will do when I have to leave her there. I don’t know how we will do it. With lot’s of prayer to give us strengthwe will do what’s best for Rosie. It makes sense to Amputate to relieve her of her pain, and get rid of all these pain pills wrecking what is left of her liver. But even thou it makes sense, my emotional side does not make sense of it. I don’t know how to reconcile the emotions with the sensibility side of this decision. It’s so hard after trying to save her leg for 6 months, to make a 180 degree turn and do the opposite. We go Monday. I’m dreading it. Here are some final pictures I just took of her now before we go. Rosie, we love you, and hope our story will inspire some other scared person like us who just wants to be happy and keep living in what we call our Rose Garden, LIFE! We’re not ready for it to end yet.
My last day at home before going to the Hospital tomorrow! It is such a nice day today. We sat in the yard I enjoyed being outside with my pawparents. I’m hopeful and confident that this leg has to go. The pain is so bad and I can’t stand it anymore. I hope we will be okay. We have to be positive. I have to go enjoy the rest of the day now and pack for my big trip tomorrow!! We’ll let you know what happens.
